Okay. Let's Be Honest.

There are days where I want to run and hide. Hide from all of the things that are my life. My family is driving me a little crazy to say the least. And the Professor and I have hit a bump in the road, a LARGE bump in the road. This never makes my life any easier. And it's not about superficial things or easily fixable things. Rather it's about life changing events and differences.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that before Homie's injury, we had goals and dreams that we both believed in, that we both wanted to happen. Now, since his injury (and quite understandably), his goals and dreams are quite different. This is a huge pill to swallow. A huge pill. Everything I had counted on, and everything I wanted (we wanted), are no longer what he wants. Or no longer things that he wants at this moment. This is tough. Very tough. Where do I go from here? What do I do now?

This keeps me up at night, to say the least. I love him, I stood beside him, nurtured him, cared for him during a very difficult period. I love the Bean. And I love being in her life, a part of her family. But holy cow, life has a way of surprising you, right!? I am having a hard time dealing with these new changes Homie wants for our future, and the absence of our old goals. And it's never easy for me to deal with change, or tuck my dreams away (even for a minute). Please help me to have patience and the ability to see the bigger picture. :). Please help Homie to see how badly I ache for this, and want this in my future.

And remember, things aren't that bad. They are definitely difficult, but not life shattering (of which I am thankful). Please remember me, and my family, in your thoughts/prayers. I would really appreciate it. Thanks.